John Egbert (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
harlequinhater) wrote2016-03-21 07:30 pm
harlequinhater) wrote2016-03-21 07:30 pm
001. [TEXT]
uh... hello? does anybody read these memo things?
is this some kind of prank? i wouldn't put it past terezi to pull something dumb like this.
so terezi if you're reading this can we just go through the "gotcha" moment and can you send me back?
anyways if you are NOT terezi and this is NOT a prank could somebody please tell me what's going on?
because last thing i can remember i was running a bunch of weird time errands for an alien girl.
and then i woke up here in a bed that is definitely NOT mine because it doesn't have cool ghost bed sheets.
also apparently i have a mom now?
she is nice i guess and this lunch box looks delicious, don't get me wrong!
but i was doing some important things!
i don't have time to be playing with this cloud bird thing!!!
(though it is a very cute cloud bird, i will give it that.)
i have tried to get back but my weird time jumping powers do not seem to work here.
and i cannot even fly anymore which is such bullshit! i forgot how lame it was to walk around everywhere.
also my sylladex is gone. so i don't have any of my cool computers or weapons.
instead i just have a backpack and this lame "poke gear" thing which doesn't even have pesterchum installed.
so. yeah.
could somebody fill me in, please?
is this some kind of prank? i wouldn't put it past terezi to pull something dumb like this.
so terezi if you're reading this can we just go through the "gotcha" moment and can you send me back?
anyways if you are NOT terezi and this is NOT a prank could somebody please tell me what's going on?
because last thing i can remember i was running a bunch of weird time errands for an alien girl.
and then i woke up here in a bed that is definitely NOT mine because it doesn't have cool ghost bed sheets.
also apparently i have a mom now?
she is nice i guess and this lunch box looks delicious, don't get me wrong!
but i was doing some important things!
i don't have time to be playing with this cloud bird thing!!!
(though it is a very cute cloud bird, i will give it that.)
i have tried to get back but my weird time jumping powers do not seem to work here.
and i cannot even fly anymore which is such bullshit! i forgot how lame it was to walk around everywhere.
also my sylladex is gone. so i don't have any of my cool computers or weapons.
instead i just have a backpack and this lame "poke gear" thing which doesn't even have pesterchum installed.
so. yeah.
could somebody fill me in, please?
[Text]
YOU'RE A TRAINER, AREN'T YOU? THERE'S NO WAY YOU'RE NOT A TRAINER.
[Meanwhile, he's. Well, okay, he hasn't been doing much breeding or training, but this still seems fucking unfair somehow.]
[Text]
why is that such a big deal?
what are you?
[Text]
I'M A BREEDER, SAME AS JADE
BUT THAT MEANS I GET TO ALL THE SHIT YOU CAN'T WITHOUT A BADGE, SO SUCKS TO BE YOU.
[Text]
....what are badges and what do they do?
[Text]
SO IT LOOKS LIKE I'LL BE FLYING SOONER THAN YOU, FUCKBERT.
[Text]
ugh that is not fair at ALL!
can we switch jobs or something? is that allowed?
because i don't want to be a trainer if it means I can't fly!
that's just stupid!
[Text]
BETTER GET TRAINING.
[Text]
like are there pokemon gyms with weights and treadmills and stuff?
i dont know if blue could handle a treadmill.
its legs look really short.
also i dont know if cloud wings are capable of picking up weights?
[Text]
IT'S A FUCKING VIDEO GAME, GENIUS, NO ONE'S GOING TO MAKE THEIR POKÉMON LIFT WEIGHTS.
[Text]
i bet that when my pokemon are strong and fully trained they will be able to lift so many weights.
it seems like a useful skill, even in battle!
imagine having a dumb bell thrown in your face.
it would hurt a lot.
[Text]
THEY CAN KILL WITH THEIR MINDS, JOHN, THEY DON'T NEED TO THROW FUCKING DUMB BELLS.
WHATEVER, THE POINT IS YOU TRAIN POKÉMON TO FIGHT OTHER POKÉMON BY HAVING THEM FIGHT FUCKING POKÉMON.
ANY OTHER QUESTIONS FROM THE IDIOT?
[Text]
i thought we were buddies now! or wait, do trolls usually call their friends idiots?
....wait a second, this doesn't have anything to do with that weird hate-romance you guys have, does it?
[Text]
NO. WHAT? NO THAT'S STUPID WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT! THAT WAS YEARS AGO JOHN I'M COMPLETELY OVER IT.
YOU BEING MY FRIEND DOES NOT PRECLUDE YOU FROM BEING AN IDIOT OR ME CALLING YOU OUT ON IT, DICKWEED, JUST ASK DAVE.
[not here]
[Text]
and if you don't call him idiot just as much as you call me an idiot then i am calling bullshit!
because frankly, that was uncalled for. i think equipping pokemon with giant metal things to throw would make them much stronger.
[Text]
SO IF I'M CALLING YOU AN IDIOT IT'S BECAUSE YOU DAMN WELL DESERVE IT AND NOT BECAUSE I'M FLIRTING WITH YOU.
WOULD YOU JUST LET THAT DIE ALREADY, I TOLD YOU I'M OVER IT. WHAT DO YOU WANT, A CONTRACT SIGNED IN BLOOD STATING THAT I, KARKAT VANTAS, HARBOR NO ROMANTIC FEELINGS FOR JOHN EGBERT WHATSOEVER?
GET THE FUCK OVER YOURSELF, I'VE MOVED ON.
AND THAT'S STILL THE STUPIDEST FUCKING IDEA I'VE EVER HEARD.
[Text]
it was just an innocent question!
i did not spend three years on a meteor with a bunch of trolls like dave did so i am not as wise to all of your weird cultural happenings as he probably is.
i didn't yell at you when you told me to calm my human tits! (which i do not have, by the way.)
so i think you can afford to chill out a little.
[Text]
[...]
WAS THAT
SOMETHING YOU WANTED TO TALK TO ME ABOUT.
[Text]
anyways, talk about what?
my non-existant human tits?
there is nothing to talk about, because i do not have them.
[Text]
NOTHING. NEVERMIND.
I AM WELL AWARE THAT THE MALES OF YOUR SPECIES DON'T HAVE TITS, JOHN, IT'S A FUCKING EXPRESSION.,