001. [TEXT]

[harlequinhater]

uh... hello? does anybody read these memo things?
is this some kind of prank? i wouldn't put it past terezi to pull something dumb like this.
so terezi if you're reading this can we just go through the "gotcha" moment and can you send me back?

anyways if you are NOT terezi and this is NOT a prank could somebody please tell me what's going on?
because last thing i can remember i was running a bunch of weird time errands for an alien girl.
and then i woke up here in a bed that is definitely NOT mine because it doesn't have cool ghost bed sheets.
also apparently i have a mom now?
she is nice i guess and this lunch box looks delicious, don't get me wrong!
but i was doing some important things!
i don't have time to be playing with this cloud bird thing!!!
(though it is a very cute cloud bird, i will give it that.)

i have tried to get back but my weird time jumping powers do not seem to work here.
and i cannot even fly anymore which is such bullshit! i forgot how lame it was to walk around everywhere.
also my sylladex is gone. so i don't have any of my cool computers or weapons.
instead i just have a backpack and this lame "poke gear" thing which doesn't even have pesterchum installed.
so. yeah.
could somebody fill me in, please?

Comments

[eclectictype]

I don't think he would want to, considering he's been on a ship with me for the past three years.

[Karkat you know, she's told you about the shitbaby tantrums. Jade is not about to stir up that cauldron again, even if she is a witch.]

We are not finished with our journey around this land either, so it's not time to settle in a farmhouse and spend the rest of our days tending to cattlemons and such.

[harlequinhater]

Uh, yeah, no offense to Jade, but it'd be kind of weird sharing a room. Not that you're not awesome, Jade! But it'd probably be best to get my own space.

[A pause, and suddenly he's rummaging in his backpack. He pulls out a wallet and waves it around a bit.]

Though how much does this place cost? Because I've got some Pokedollars, but I don't know how much this is? Can I afford to stay here?

[callbacks]

Nope.

[Helpful as ever. He tips his chair back again, because some people don't learn lessons the first time around.]

Get a job.

[quadrangle]

[.......... but if they're siblings then. It. ???????? Okay you know what, fuck it, he gives up.]

Six hundred a night. You're going to need a fucking job.

[eclectictype]

Yep, it's time for you to join the working force just like the rest of us, Egbert!

[Of course she's smiling at having to say something like this.]

But be careful with what you say around some of the people we're traveling with--Yang will suplex you and then make you put some of your paycheck in the swear jar!

[harlequinhater]

What kind of work force is there in Pokemon land anyways? How am I supposed to get a job? I don't even have a resume!

[And wait- suplex? Swear jar? What has he gotten himself into?]

...Also who is Yang and why does she care so much about swearing?

[callbacks]

[Okay no, one of these things is of way more immediate importance than the other.]

She's one of the girls we've been traveling with. She, uh...

[How does he put this.]

One of the other girls is her sister, and Yang's got, uh. Feelings. About language.

[He shoots Jade a betrayed look. How could you, Jade. How could you sell him and Karkat out like this.]

[quadrangle]

[... The Fucking Swear Jar. Excuse him, he needs to join Dave in sending Jade betrayed looks.]

She's... blond, that's the word, right? [What are hair colors.] Like Dave said, she has fucking opinions. Weiss, too, but she's not as obnoxious about it.

[Sort of, anyway. Also, yeah, uh—]

What the fuck is a resume?

[eclectictype]

Karkat's just saying that because he's scared of her. But yeah, Yang's younger sister Ruby is here and she doesn't want her to be exposed to nasty language.

[And she's completely ignoring the betrayed looks because, seriously? She's just warning her brother, you babies.]

You'd be surprised, they let us work anywhere with no resumes required! It's so weird, but fun? I like working at the drive in!

[harlequinhater]

I guess it makes sense if she has a little sister. I will do my best not to swear around little kids either!

[He might be underestimating Ruby's age based on that comment.]

Okay so.... you can just get hired? No questions? I don't even need a fancy suit for an interview? I guess I could probably find somewhere to work, then... Though it seems pretty stupid to have to work an actual real life job in the middle of a Pokemon adventure.