harlequinhater | 001. [TEXT]

uh... hello? does anybody read these memo things?
is this some kind of prank? i wouldn't put it past terezi to pull something dumb like this.
so terezi if you're reading this can we just go through the "gotcha" moment and can you send me back?

anyways if you are NOT terezi and this is NOT a prank could somebody please tell me what's going on?
because last thing i can remember i was running a bunch of weird time errands for an alien girl.
and then i woke up here in a bed that is definitely NOT mine because it doesn't have cool ghost bed sheets.
also apparently i have a mom now?
she is nice i guess and this lunch box looks delicious, don't get me wrong!
but i was doing some important things!
i don't have time to be playing with this cloud bird thing!!!
(though it is a very cute cloud bird, i will give it that.)

i have tried to get back but my weird time jumping powers do not seem to work here.
and i cannot even fly anymore which is such bullshit! i forgot how lame it was to walk around everywhere.
also my sylladex is gone. so i don't have any of my cool computers or weapons.
instead i just have a backpack and this lame "poke gear" thing which doesn't even have pesterchum installed.
so. yeah.
could somebody fill me in, please?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

its super dumb i agree!
though who is crescent rose?

Crescent Rose is my weapon!!
a high-impact sniper-scythe that I built myself!
it's pretty much totally awesome

oh! well crescent rose is a really cool name for a weapon.
and it sounds like a really cool weapon in general!
i had an awesome hammer that was called zillyhoo, but it was given to me by a bunny.
i don't think i'd know how to make a hammer if i tried.

that's a really silly name!!
Is it special somehow?
if it has a name it's gotta be special!

... but um
what do you mean it was given to you by a bunny???
do you mean a faunus? 'cause I'm pretty sure they don't like being called by what their animal parts are :(!

i think its supposed to be pretty special! it's very colorful at least.
but i did not ask about its backstory.
mostly because it is a hammer that cannot talk.

anyways, i mean it was a literal bunny.
it was part yarn-made rabbit, part robot rabbit, and part stuffed bunny that was actually in the movie con air.
her name was liv tyler.

........

what

what?
is it unusual for hammers to not talk in your world?

No!
well I mean
yeah that's not really something you see a lot. Or at all.
but the thing with the bunny...!

liv tyler was a very special bunny.
she got passed around through some timeline shenanigans i think?
anyways at one point she got robot enhancements so she could move and wield tiny weapons and stuff.

okay

now that is really cool!!

could she kick a lot of butt even with tiny weapons???

yeah!! i mean, as far as i remember anyways.
this was three years ago and i am not completely sure what happened to her after we left our game session...
i hope she's doing okay wherever she is though.

well if she can kick butt
even if she's a little bunny
I'm sure she's fine!!!

[... WAIT HOLD THE PHONE. Game session... and the colored text...]

hey can I ask something weird
I mean it's not really weird but it's kinda outta nowhere
but do you know a guy named dave strider?

yeah!
dave is like my best bro.
he is a giant dork, though. don't let him convince you otherwise.
why do you ask?

I was just kinda curious
since your text and the way you talk about games and stuff reminds me of him!!

he's a really cool guy, he's one of my friends here!!
and he's super nice too
he helped me find one of my friends when I first showed up here

dave can definitely be cool sometimes, but do not ever tell him that i told you that.
he just needs to lay off of his whole irony thing sometimes.
you found your friend okay, right?

aww, why wouldn't you want him to know you called him cool?
I mean it's true!!

uh-huh. She was traveling with him, so all he needed to do was teleport me to her!

because that would be too sappy, and probably inflate his ego to unbearable levels.
it is for the good of us all.

and that's awesome! he teleported me, too. it is pretty handy that pokemon are basically magical.

psh, nothing wrong with a lil sap!
it holds us all together after all

right??? and they just let kids have super powerful creatures like this!!
it seems kinda unsafe but hey I'm not really complaining

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